Risk management by a sensible Chihuahua

It is not sensible to walk a Chihuahua through a dark park while singing ABBA.

I come over for sleepovers — a very sensible Chihuahua — and she walks me at night.

If you ask me, it’s a strategic error.

It’s already dark, and I can’t see much beyond the end of my nose. 

This is not a time for emotional expression. This is a time for perimeter control.

I am small, but I am not careless. I scan constantly for movement, sound or scent. I am a professional.

She starts belting out ABBA as soon as we hit the park.
I know all her songs by heart, because I have to.

The Winner Takes It All is acceptable. It provides a steady 4/4 beat, allowing me to maintain rhythm while I scan for the Great Nugget. There is order to it. I can work with that.

Fernando is also useful. It usually means we are heading home. There will be sardines. This is a reliable system.

What I really hate is One of Us.
I don’t understand why we have to stop every time. 

The loud part. The high note. The part where she tries to reach something that is clearly out of range.

I sit on her foot.

A stationary human in the dark is a vulnerable target for flying foxes.

She sings louder. I don’t think she notices anything around her. But I do.

I stay close to her legs when One of Us starts. Someone has to.